BarefootinBoston

E is quite a fussy, noisey baby. I often worry about it. I have had several people tell me not to. “He’s a baby. They are supposed to cry!” is the typical response.

With his teething, he has been even more fussy than usual. His naps have been tough. He has been crying for a bit before falling asleep, more so than usual. Thursday was a particularly difficult day. He was putting up quite a fight to go to sleep. The people upstairs were being very noisy (mind you, this was at 3 in the AFTERNOON on a weekday?!?!). As soon as I would calm him down, it would be nice and quiet, and the upstairs neighbors would start making a racket. They would stop when he started to cry, and start up again once he stopped. Intentional? I think so.

Needless to say, I was getting incredibly angry. I understand that it’s in the afternoon, and that noise making isn’t a big deal. I wouldn’t care so much if I didn’t think (eh hem, KNOW) that they were doing it to be rude. So, the only thought in my head was to go, bring screaming E, into the back hallway where they could hear him even better. So, I took him from his crib, unlocked the door, and stepped into the hallway. As I closed the door behind me, I heard the door slammer say “Oh boy, the baby is crying again!” I had so many thoughts run through my head at that moment that I wanted to shout up to her, but I refrained.

I stewed and stewed. Called A, MJ, both understanding and both agreeing with me that this was a bit crazy. I had no idea what to do. I didn’t want to call her on it and make the last week here a total living hell, but I really didn’t want her to feel that this was ok.

As I was talking with A that evening, I made a comment that so many people tell me that babies cry, and it’s ok. To which he responded, they have all had kids. When I thought about it, I realized he was so right. Which only led me to one conclusion, people who don’t have children can never understand.

And I say that once being a person without a child, not too long ago at that. And I remember thinking, can’t that parent make that baby be quiet (and I LOVE children). Yup, guilty as charged. Another way being a mother has changed me. But somehow, on that day, I forgot what it was like to not have a child and hear a screaming baby. An annoyance to some, it’s the only answer to others. Sometimes letting your little one cry is all you’re able to do. And I would like to think that, regardless of people’s parent status, this could be an understanding amongst us all. Sadly, I am mistaken.

In the newest issue of Parents magazine, there is an article (more like a ’schedule’ with one liners below pictures) on how to keep a baby happy. Obviously it doesn’t include every feeding, diapering and every naptime, and it’s kind of wacky, but here it is:

7 a.m.-tummy time

9 a.m.-stay close (wear baby around in baby carrier)

10 a.m.-take a walk

12 p.m.-table for one (baby sits in high chair and ‘reads’ a book while mom eats or cleans)

1 p.m.-let’s explore (activity center time for 30 minutes)

2 p.m.-naptime

4 p.m.-solo play

7 p.m.-wind down ( activity mat play)

Ok, when I read this, I was almost on the floor laughing. Not really. I was wondering if this is what every other babies’ day is like. Our schedule goes a little like this:

5:30 a.m.-wake up and scream until bottle inserted in mouth (change diaper before bottle)

If I’m lucky E falls back asleep, if not, he’s up for 1-2 hours.

The rest of the day goes something like this (until 6 when A come home!)

eat, attempt to have E play alone, lasts 2 minutes, play with him, sleep

Repeat until 6-sometimes there’s walks, trips to the store, and playgroup visits thrown in the mix, but it’s generally a mixture of that.

6-fed last solids meal, bathtime, naked time, bottle, bedtime at 7

As previously posted about, E is a high need child, well, so far that I can tell. All of these suggestions that Parents magazine made, however well and good, do not happen to work for my little guy. He will not play happily with a book in his highchair while I eat or clean. He will not hang out on the floor on his stomach with me, but scream until I turn him over. And what I would give for him to have a little solo play, what I would GIVE!

But as he is getting older, I do notice that he is able to entertain himself for a LITTLE (and I do mean little) longer…sometimes he’ll be in his exersaucer for 5 minutes-that’s quite the feat for E. Somehow, he will complain more when I try to get him to play alone than when A does-I am sure he knows he can work me. Oh boy does he have me wrapped around his little finger.

But honestly, I don’t think there’s anywhere else I would rather be…well, not many places…